Only for a moment

I see a little kid waiting to be discovered for her ballet moves in her soccer uniform and I wonder how many times I've done the same thing. How many times I've played to the wrong audience. How many times I went big when I really should have just gone home.

I'm trying to hit halfway through coding tonight, but it's slow going. I want to go home.

Below is something I came up with almost a month ago. It describes me perfectly at junctures.

I can be big and brave

I can venture a conscious dream

I can dance professionally

I can dare to publish baby books

I can be happy and un wary

I can live a hundred lives and be guest to a thousand feasts

But my feats are unconditionally tied to my courage

My fleeting, waning courage

So I can feel the sweetness of a victory, but only for a moment.